Good news and bad news. The good news: Scientists in Japan have figured out a way to keep your kid from getting potentially LIFE-THREATENING pneumonia or bronchitis this winter. The bad news? You have to get them hammered.
The scientists found that a chemical compound in the hops that are used to make beer is extremely effective against respiratory diseases, especially in children. It can also help prevent colds or the flu in adults.
BUT . . . because beers use a relatively low amount of hops, you or your kid would have to drink about THIRTY CANS A DAY to get the virus-fighting effect.
The researchers say the next step would be taking the chemical compound from hops and making it into an injection so, ya know, you could get the positive effects without getting your kids super drunk.
One final note. I probably shouldn't HAVE to say this, but just to be on the safe side . . . don't give your kid 30 beers.